The politics of clothes
Why can the men in my office come into work with an opened neck shirt when the women are required to wear jewellery and make-up? Talk about a double standard. Of course there is no specific obligation to dress a certain way. The organisation I work for is very accepting but I feel the eyes of judgement on me when I reject the "woman as decorative" mindset and wear whatever I damn well please.
At staff meetings, I want to scream at the glances I get. Yes I am a woman. Yes I am not wearing make-up. Yes I am not wearing jewellery. No you cannot fucking judge me, especially not in your open toed hippie sandals and an open necked shirt with stains. My body is not public property.
The decorative role of women is demeaning. I reject the standards set by society but I still feel the humiliation of non-compliance. In a casual office setting, all should be set to the same standard. If men can come in dressed without ties, then women should be able to come in without earrings.
I understand that office professional is in vogue all over the world. I understand the politics of interviewing for the job. I wear earrings at most of my jobs but here I wear a motorbike helmet and often lose earrings putting it on and taking it off. It is a practical consideration in addition to a feminist equality rant.
Now I'm not dissing the "look good, feel good" point of view. At home I dress up cos it makes me feel good but I'm in Cambodia now. In Cambodia, one is always sweating; one's tailor can never get the clothes exactly right; security warns you not to wear jewellery because of thieves (one does anyway); one feels so far from home that fashion is the least consideration.
My work clothes are perfectly acceptable, but I lack accessories. I also lack the money to sparkle myself up, which I can live with. I prefer to spend my extra cash on books and entertainment, especially considering my job.
Nobody sees me in my office where I am hidden behind huge piles of paper. Why should I wear heels when nobody can see my sneakers? Why wear make up when it will, firstly, sweat off and, secondly, get mixed up with the twenty years of dust I blow of each piece of paper? A little practicality please!
The only dress code is in the judging eyes of my co workers. I will continue to ignore it but I do wonder... Will my dress sense work against me? Will my boss remember my sneakers when he's writing my reference? Will I be always remember as the woman who didn't wear the matching earrings, necklace and bracelet? Maybe I will and if I am, j'emmerde le monde!
At staff meetings, I want to scream at the glances I get. Yes I am a woman. Yes I am not wearing make-up. Yes I am not wearing jewellery. No you cannot fucking judge me, especially not in your open toed hippie sandals and an open necked shirt with stains. My body is not public property.
The decorative role of women is demeaning. I reject the standards set by society but I still feel the humiliation of non-compliance. In a casual office setting, all should be set to the same standard. If men can come in dressed without ties, then women should be able to come in without earrings.
I understand that office professional is in vogue all over the world. I understand the politics of interviewing for the job. I wear earrings at most of my jobs but here I wear a motorbike helmet and often lose earrings putting it on and taking it off. It is a practical consideration in addition to a feminist equality rant.
Now I'm not dissing the "look good, feel good" point of view. At home I dress up cos it makes me feel good but I'm in Cambodia now. In Cambodia, one is always sweating; one's tailor can never get the clothes exactly right; security warns you not to wear jewellery because of thieves (one does anyway); one feels so far from home that fashion is the least consideration.
My work clothes are perfectly acceptable, but I lack accessories. I also lack the money to sparkle myself up, which I can live with. I prefer to spend my extra cash on books and entertainment, especially considering my job.
Nobody sees me in my office where I am hidden behind huge piles of paper. Why should I wear heels when nobody can see my sneakers? Why wear make up when it will, firstly, sweat off and, secondly, get mixed up with the twenty years of dust I blow of each piece of paper? A little practicality please!
The only dress code is in the judging eyes of my co workers. I will continue to ignore it but I do wonder... Will my dress sense work against me? Will my boss remember my sneakers when he's writing my reference? Will I be always remember as the woman who didn't wear the matching earrings, necklace and bracelet? Maybe I will and if I am, j'emmerde le monde!
|
Bookmark this post:
|
|
2 comments:
Most people dress to feel good themselves. Maybe you would feel better if you made more of an effort. It seems to me that the lady does protest too much. Could you keep some ear-rings, a necklace or a bracelet that are not too expensive - cheap and cheerful- in your drawer at work and put them on when you arrive. Then you would not have to wonder what people are thinking and you might feel better. Could you not, too, have a simple pair of plain stylish shoes that you keep in the office and wear at work. Surely that would be worth it to get you a more favourable reference. You can have a bag at work to contain your sneakers as I expect that you need them for the motorcycle. As for the make-up a spot of lipstick never goes amiss but your argument about other make-up in a sweltering climate is sound and you are right not to plaster your facein order to perspire. Nourish your skin though. A touch of moisturising cream will do wonders.
There are important conventions about dressing for work and it can be important and rewarding to take note of them - particularly if we depend on other peoples' appraisals of us to get promotion or another job.
It is not such a big deal to make an effort and it does enhance our work day experience if those around us have made an effort to present themselves well. It can be embarrassing and off-putting if our colleagues look scruffy and scruffy has different definitions in different circumstances. You seem to have a clear idea of what protocol demands of you in the matter of a dress code and you are clearly aware that you are not meeting the expected standard. That does not seem to me to be wise. You are putting yourself on the defensive and you are clearly defensive in your blog. Why put yourself in that position? It is not nice to be on the defensive especially if you expect to be looking for a reference. You can address the issue by presenting yourself well. You will be happier. Your co-workers will be happier. You will honour their expectations and feel better yourself and you will have banished a problem that concerns you. What is there to lose? There might be a lot to gain. Your boss might be impressed and give you a better reference. Of course it might all be in your imagination and if your boss is a man he might not notice. If it is a she - she will notice and be impressed. Your co-workers will notice.
You will probably feel better yourself anyway and that is the best reason for doing it. We always feel so much better when we present ourselves well. Think of how good we feel after a trip to the hairdresser.
You are clearly concerned about this matter or you would not have written about it. It is easier to take action than to feel resentment. Resentment thrives when we give it our full attention and then it grows and festers. Better to give the attention to solving the problem that concerns us and then to get on with life.
Good luck and be happy.
You miss the point Anon. I was not referring to being my being scruffy but to the ridiculous standards women are held too and men are not.
I dress in a perfectly acceptable way but I do not try to look like a Barbie doll at work. I don't want to especially when the men of the office walk around like backpackers.
Your comment only shows that you think that this type of inequality is justified because 'teh girlz should be pretty to please the menfolk'. I reject that attitude.
Post a Comment